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Saturday 11 December 2010

THE POWER OF ULTIMATE DECISION


The story goes on like this:

We understand Making Money online is a business but we also know that right now, many people are dealing with some tough economic times, so we wanted to share the following.

Enjoy it!

SPECIAL GROCERY LIST

Louise Redden, a poorly dressed lady with a look of defeat on her face, walked into a grocery store.

She approached the owner of the store in a most humble manner and asked if he would let her charge a few groceries.

She softly explained that her husband was very ill and unable to work, they had seven children and they needed food.

John Longhouse, the grocer, scoffed at her and requested that she leave his store at once.

Visualizing the family needs, she said: 'Please, sir! I will bring you the money just as soon as I can. '

John told her he could not give her credit, since she did not have a charge account at his store.

Standing beside the counter was a customer who overheard the conversation between the two. The customer walked forward and told the grocer that he would stand good for whatever she needed for her family.

The grocer said in a very reluctant voice, 'Do you have a grocery list?'

Louise replied, 'Yes sir.' 'OK' he said, 'put your grocery list on the scales and whatever your grocery list weighs, I will give you that amount in groceries.'

Louise, hesitated a moment with a bowed head, then she reached into her purse and took out a piece of paper and scribbled something on it. She then laid the piece of paper on the scale carefully with her head still bowed.

The eyes of the grocer and the customer showed a amazement when the scales went down and stayed down.

The grocer, staring at the scales, turned slowly to the customer and said begrudgingly, 'I can't believe it.'

The customer smiled and the grocer started putting the groceries on the other side of the scales. The scale did not balance so he continued to put more and more groceries on them until the scales would hold no more

The grocer stood there in utter disgust. Finally, he grabbed the piece of paper from the scales and looked at it with greater amazement.

It was not a grocery list, it was a prayer, which said:

'Dear Lord, you know my needs and I am leaving this in your hands.'

The grocer gave her the groceries that he had gathered and stood in stunned silence.

Louise thanked him and left the store.

The other customer handed a fifty-dollar bill to the grocer and said;

'It was worth every penny of it. Only God Knows how much a prayer weighs.'

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Wednesday 1 December 2010

FINDING A LIFE PARTNER



5 Golden rules for finding your life partner by Dov Heller, M.A.

A relationships coach lays out his 5 golden rules for evaluating the prospects of long-term marital success. When it comes to making the decision about choosing a life partner, no one wants to make a mistake. Yet, with a divorce rate of close to 50 percent, it appears that many are making serious mistakes in their approach to finding Mr. /Ms. Right!

If you ask most couples who are engaged why they're getting married, they'll
say: "We're in love." I believe this is the number 1 mistake people make when they date. Choosing a life partner should never be based on love. Though this may sound not politically correct, there's a profound truth here. Love is not the basis for getting married. Rather, love is the result of a good marriage.  When the other ingredients are right, then the love will come. Let me say it again: You can't build a lifetime relationship on love alone. You need a lot more. Here are five questions you must ask yourself if you're serious about finding and keeping a life partner.

QUESTION #1:
Do we share a common life purpose?

Why is this so important? Let me put it this way:  If you're married for 20 or 30 years, that's a long time to live with someone. What do you plan to do with each other all that time?  Travel, eat and jog together? You need to share something deeper and more meaningful. You need a common life purpose. Two things can happen in a marriage. You can grow together, or you can grow apart. 50 percent of the people out there are growing apart. To make a marriage work, you need to know what you want out of life bottom line-and marry someone who wants the same thing.
QUESTION #2:
Do I feel safe expressing my feelings and thoughts with this person?
This question goes to the core of the quality of your relationship. Feeling safe means you can communicate openly with this person. The basis of having good communication is trust - i.e. trust that I won't get "punished" or hurt for expressing my honest thoughts and feelings. A colleague of mine defines an abusive person as someone with whom you feel afraid to express your thoughts and feelings. Be honest with yourself on this one. Make sure you feel emotionally safe with the person you plan to marry.

QUESTION #3:
Is he/she a munch?
A munch is someone who is a refined and sensitive person. How can you test? Here are some suggestions. Do they work on personal growth on a regular basis? Are they serious about improving themselves?  A teacher of mine defines a good person as "someone who is always striving to be good and do the right thing." So ask about your significant other: What do they do with their time? Is this person materialistic? Usually a materialistic person is not someone whose top priority is character refinement. There are essentially two types of people in the world:  People who are dedicated to personal growth and people who are dedicated to seeking comfort.
Someone whose goal in life is to be comfortable will put personal comfort ahead of doing the right thing. You need to know that before walking down the aisle.

QUESTION #4:
How does he/she treat other people?
The one most important thing that makes any relationship work is the ability to give.  By giving, we mean the ability to give another person pleasure.
Ask: Is this someone who enjoys giving pleasure to others or are they wrapped up in themselves and self- absorbed? To measure this, think about the following: How do they treat people whom they do not have to be nice to, such as a waiters, bus boy, taxi driver, etc. How do they treat parents and siblings? Do they have gratitude and appreciation?  If they don't have gratitude for the people who have given them everything, you cannot you--who can't do nearly as much for them! Do they gossip and speak badly about others?  Someone who gossips cannot be someone who loves others. You can be sure that someone who treats others poorly will eventually treat you poorly as well. 

QUESTION #5:
Is there anything I'm hoping to change about this person after we're married?
Too many people make the mistake of marrying someone with the intention of trying to "improve" them after they're married.  As a colleague of mine puts it, "You can probably expect someone to change after marriage ...for the worse!"
If you cannot fully accept this person the way they are now, then you are not ready to marry them.

In conclusion, dating doesn't have to be difficult and treacherous. The key is to try leading a little more with your head and less with your heart. It pays to be as objective as possible when you are dating, to be sure to ask questions that will help you get to the key issues.

Falling in love is a great feeling, but when you wake up with a ring on your finger, you don't want to find yourself in trouble because you didn't do your homework.

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Another perspective...
There are some people in your life that need to be loved from a distance. It's amazing what you can accomplish when you let go of or at least minimize your time with draining, negative, incompatible, not-going anywhere relationships.  Observe the relationships around you. Pay attention. Which ones lift and which ones lean? Which ones encourage and which ones discourage? Which ones are on a path of growth uphill and which ones are going downhill? When you leave certain people do you feel better or feel worse?  Which ones always have drama or don't really understand, know, or appreciate you?

The more you seek quality, respect, growth, peace of mind, love and truth around you...the easier it will become for you to decide who gets to sit in the front row and who should be moved to the balcony of your life.

An African proverb states, "Before you get married, keep both eyes open, and after you marry, close one eye." Before you get involved and make a commitment to someone, don't let lust, desperation, immaturity, ignorance, pressure from others or a low self-esteem make you blind to warning signs. Keep your eyes open, and don't fool yourself that you can change someone or that what you see as faults isn't really that important.

Once you decide to commit to someone, over time their flaws, vulnerabilities, pet-peeves and differences will become more obvious. If you love your mate and want the relationship to grow and evolve, you've got to learn how to close one eye and not let every little thing bother you. You and your mate have many different expectations, emotional needs, values, dreams, weaknesses and strengths. You are two unique individual children of God who have decided to share a life together.  Neither one of you is perfect, but are you perfect for each other? Do you bring out the best in each other? Do you compliment and compromise with each other, or do you compete, compare and control? What do you bring to the relationship? Do you bring past relationships, past hurt, past mistrust, past pain? You can't take someone to the altar to alter them. You can't make someone love you or make someone stay. If you develop self-esteem, spiritual discernment, and "a life" you won't find yourself making someone else responsible for your happiness or responsible for your pain. Manipulation, control, jealousy, neediness and selfishness are not the ingredients of a thriving, healthy, loving and lasting relationship. Seeking status, sex, and security are the wrong reasons to be in a relationship.

WHAT KEEPS A RELATIONSHIP STRONG IS:
1. Trust
2. Communication,
3. Intimacy,
4. A sense of humour,
5. Sharing tasks
6. Some getaway time without business or children,
7. Daily exchanges (a meal, shared activity, a hug, a call, a touch,
a note),  
8. Sharing common goals and interests,
9. Giving each other space to grow without feeling insecure,
10. Giving each other a sense of belonging and assurances of commitment if these qualities are missing, the relationship will erode as resentment, withdrawal, abuse, neglect, dishonesty and pain WILL replace the passion.

There it goes,
so happy hunting for your partner for life!!






WHY ARE BLACK WOMEN SCARING OFF THEIR MEN?

WHY BLACK WOMEN ARE SCARING OFF THEIR MEN?

Have you met this woman? She has a good job, works hard, and earns a good salary. She went to college, got her Master's degree; she is intelligent. She is personable, articulate, well-read, interested in everybody and everything. Yet she's single.

Or maybe you know this one. She is active in the church, faithful, and committed. She sings in the choir, serves on the usher board, and attends every committee meeting. She loves the Lord and knows the Word. You'd think that with her command of the Scriptures and the respect of her church members, she'd have a marriage as solid as a rock. But again, no husband!

Or perhaps you recognize the community activist. She's a black lady - or as she prefers, an African woman-on-the move. She spots a short natural, sometimes cornrow braids, or even dreadlocks. She’s an organizer, a motivator, a dynamo. Her work for her people speaks for itself - organizing women for self-help collective, raising funds for a community cause, educating others around a new issue in South Africa. Black folks look up to her, and white folks know she's a force to be reckoned with. Yet once again, the men leave her alone.

What do these women have in common? They have so much. What is it they lack? Why is it they may be able to hook a man but can’t hold him?

The women puzzle over this quandary themselves. They gather at professional clubs, at sorority meetings or over coffee at the office and wonder what's wrong with black men.

They hold special prayer vigils and fast and pray and beg Jesus to send the men back to church. They find the brothers attending political strategizing sessions or participating in protests, but when it comes time to go home, the brothers go home to someone else.

I know these women because I am among all these women. And after asking over and over again "What's wrong with these men?” it finally dawned on me to ask the question, "WHAT'S WRONG WITH WOMEN?" What I have found, and what many of these women have yet to discover, is that the skills that make one successful in the church, community or workplace are not the skills that make one successful in a relationship.

Linear thinking, self-reliance, structured goals and direct action assist one in getting assignments done, in organizing church or club activities or in positioning oneself for a raise. But the relationship building requires different skills. It requires making decisions that not only seek to gratify you, but also satisfy others. It means doing things that will keep the peace rather than achieve the goal, and sometimes it means creating the peace in the first place.

Maintaining a harmonious relationship will not always allow you to take the straight line between two points. You may have to stop to conquer or yield to win. In too many cases, when dealing with men, you will have to sacrifice being right in order to enjoy being loved.

Being acknowledged, as the head of the household is an especially important thing for many black men, since their manhood is so often actively challenged everywhere else.

Many modern women are so independent, so self-sufficient, so committed to the cause, to the church, to career - or their narrow concepts of same, that their entire personalities project an ”I don't need a man" message. So they end up without one. An interested man may be attracted but, he soon discovers that this sister makes very little space for him in her life.

Going to graduate school is a good goal and an option that previous generations of blacks have not had. But sometimes the achieving woman will place her boyfriend so low on her list of priorities that his interest wanes. Between work, school and homework, she’s seldom "there" for him for the preliminaries that might develop into a commitment to a woman. She's too busy to prepare him a home-cooked meal or to be a listening ear for his concerns because she is so occupied with her own.

Soon he uses her only for uncommitted sex since to him she appears unavailable for anything else. Blind to the part she’s playing in the problem, she ends up thinking, "Men only want one thing." And she decides she's better off with the degree than the friendship.  When she's 45, she may wish she'd set different priorities while she was younger.

It's not just the busy career girl who can't see the forest for the trees. Couples I know were having marital troubles. During one argument, the husband confronted the wife and asked what she thought they should do about the marriage, what direction they should take. She reached for her Bible and turned to Ephesians. "I know what Paul says and I know what Jesus says about marriage," she told him. "What do you say about our marriage?” the man asks. Dumbfounded, she could not say anything. Like so many of us, she could recite the Scriptures but could not apply them to everyday living. Before the year was out, the husband had filed for divorce.

Women who focus on civil rights or community activism have vigorous fighting spirits and are prepared to do whatever, whenever, to benefit black people. That's good. That's necessary. But it needs to be kept in perspective. It's too easy to save the world and lose your man. A fighting spirit is important on the battlefield, but a gentler one is wanted on the home front. Too many women are winning the battle and losing the home.

Sometimes in our determined efforts to be strong believers and hard workers, the contemporary women downplay, denigrate or simply forget their more traditional feminine attributes. Men value women best for the ways they are different from them, not the ways they are the same. Men appreciate women for their grace and beauty. Men enjoy women for their softness and see it as a way to be in touch with their tender side, a side they dare not show to other men.

A hard-working woman is good to have on your committee. But, when a man goes home, he'd prefer a loving partner to a hard worker.  It's not an easy transition for the modern black woman to make. It sounds submissive, reactionary, outmoded, and oppressive. We have fought so hard for so many things, and rightfully so. We have known so many men who were shaky, jive and untrustworthy. Yet we must admit that we are shaky, jive and wilful in our own ways. Not having a husband allows a woman to do whatever she wants, when and how she wants to do it. Having one means a woman has to share the power and certain points will have to be surrendered.



We are terrified of marriage and commitment - yet dread the prospect of being single and alone. Throwing ourselves into work seems to fill the void without posing a threat. But like any other drug, the escape eventually becomes the cage. To make the break, we need to do less and "be" more. I am learning to "be still and know," to be trusting. I am learning to stop competing with black men and to collaborate with them, to temper my assertive and aggressive energy with softness and serenity.

I'm not preaching a philosophy of "women should be seen and not heard." But I have come to realize that I - and many of my smart and independent sisters are out of touch with their feminine centre and therefore out of touch with their men.














We Love Them

We Love them
 
We can never be this strong without them
We never knew we’ll love them like the way we do
And we love it when they love us
They save room for us
We want them to stay a little longer
We sometimes fall and falling hard but we are falling from grace because of them
We lose hope at times somehow they find a way to give it back to us
How they tell us (you don’t have to be brave) but we want to and for them
How they haunt us when they not with us (missing them)
We are not saints
But they make us look like the perfect angels…..
How they keep us on our feet
We will always remember
That passionate kisses under the summer rain
We will be working sitting behind our desk, minutes before going home thinking of how they will be waiting for us.
How her perfume smell still on your pillows and we are just grabbing it like it was them.
How we will watch movies and their heads on our shoulders and how we wish that movie doesn’t have an ending
We will look at them and think what a beautiful lady so materialized
How they make us listen to all that silly love songs
Every time we see their face there
Is a part of us that can’t bear to let go.
They make us lose words to say
And bring out the best of us at times (like me….)
How they will say that we will find that better day
 
And for once in our lives
We have found the key to our dreams is
 
Love them


Tuesday 28 September 2010

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For those that have once been estranged from their lands!!

Many can identify with this... I was given a priviledge to address parliament on matters concerning some of the lest fortunate of society. Please go through this article and tell us your honest opinions about what you think of our ideas. These ideas are not to be seen as gospel truth but they are genuine facts.

Friday, August 26, 2005

Madame Speaker,
Honorable Members of the House,
Honorable Ministers and Premiers,
Distinguished Guests,
Ladies and Gentlemen,
Fellow refugees,
May I be allowed, in this august House, to take this time to express the concerns threatening the refugee in order to bring close to the highest present sensibilities represented here, a message to bring a new order of peace, hope and change to all the refugees and asylum seekers in South Africa. I will start by an apology as I may take time going through the pages I have prepared for his cause. I am also aware of the fact that some Members of this House will struggle to understand the meaning and the pronunciation of some words that I will utter because of my broken English. I am also aware of the fact that some refugees may have a say, but speaking openly one’s mind in this House is to invite death for some of us.
To speak so that South Africa can listen, think, plan and act can only be achieved through this House. I am very delighted to see that, despite my three different letters left with no reply, requesting this House for an avenue to address, in my own capacity, the concern of refugees in this country has been received differently.
Honorable Speaker, the political record of African leaderships and governments over the last two decades until our days still speaks better in terms of refugee credentials. I am sure you may have found, as I have, that most of our leaders were once in their lifetime refugees. This reality could not only bring hope that the future is bright but also prosperity to refugees wherever they are found in Africa because the leadership has experienced the hardships surrounding the unfortunate fate of refuge. Contrary to this, Africa has turned the back against her own people, and Africans have proven unable to think back even about their most recent history. This reality goes far as saying that some African heroes were once refugees for one cause or another. The reality to become a hero for the cause of humanity rests on virtues such as the theological virtues (love, charity, and peace), the moral or cardinal virtues and the civil virtues (that oblige us to honor and love our nations and the laws therein). All these values are well enshrined in the persona of the refugee. This also goes far as saying that South Africa can also produce heroes among the many refugees she hosts. In addition, whether we have to accept this reality or not, it comes to all of us to answer the question "who is a hero and what sacrifice are we going to pay for this?" In short, a hero is not the person who performs extraordinary things but any person who performs ordinary things in an extraordinary way. Refugees are not out of the definition.
False are the ideas that refugees come to South Africa to find a better life. They rather come here to find a place of safety.
Madame Speaker, in order to answer the many dilemmas facing the refugee in South Africa, we need to go back to the very first value enshrined in the Constitution of the Republic of South Africa:
"We the People of South Africa,
Recognize the injustices of our past,
Believe that South Africa belongs to all who live in it
United in our diversity."
Madame Speaker, during his State of the Nation address on 6 February 2004, President Thabo Mbeki, quoting from President Nelson Mandela said:
"The government I have the honor to lead and I dare say the masses that elected us to serve in this role, are inspired by the single vision of creating a people-centered society. Accordingly, the purpose that will drive this government shall be the expansion of the frontiers of human fulfilment, the continuous extension of the frontiers of freedom. The acid test of the legitimacy of the programmes we elaborate, the government institutions we create, the legislation we adopt, must be whether they serve these objectives."
Madame Speaker, this question again comes: "How does South Africa belong to refugees who live here, how do they reach their human fulfilment in South Africa and what is it needed to help them build their home away from home?" To answer this question, we need to look at the following issues and provide realistic answers:
  1. Xenophobia
Madame Speaker,
Honorable Members,
The word "foreigner" in the South African context only extends to "black Africans" from outside South Africa. On top of the word, another descriptive is added: "Makwere kwere", which if it were a virus, could have taken many. We have had incidents where police officers or immigration officers call us makwere kwere. In these instances, it has involved a refugee who displays his temporary permit (refugee status). The officer takes it, tears it off and incriminates the refugee concerned under the pretext that he is an illegal immigrant. On 24 January 2004, the Cape Times reported on an incident in which eight elements of the SAPS viciously kicked three Congolese refugees in Nyanga and called them makwere kwere. In other incidents, police failed to respond to calls made by refugees and said refugees should sort out their problems themselves.
Refugees are being killed in cold blood or at gunpoint, beaten in their residences, specifically in townships and other areas such as Salt River and Woodstock in the Western Cape, Berea, Soweto, Hillbrow, Yeoville in Gauteng and other areas around the country for merely being makwere kwere.
Madame Speaker, I know of an incident in which a South African citizen was being victim of xenophobic assaults because he was so dark and tall, and was suspected to be a foreigner while I, a kwere kwere, walked passed.
Madame Speaker,
Honorable Members,
I can also take this platform to talk against the institutionalization of xenophobia in South Africa. Those of us who have visited Attridgeville, west of Pretoria very recently will have witnessed a street named "Mokwerekwere Street." If street names were changed because they still reflected the discriminatory nature of the South African past, it is clear and evident that this name creates a new era in the South African discrimination, where discrimination is oriented against black Africans who are acknowledged to have played a pivotal role in the South African liberation.
At work, many employers have a different salary for refugees and for South Africans all doing the same job and working the same hours per shift. We are denied specific services because of our status in the country, such as renting a property, opening a bank account, access to the labour market…
Madame Speaker,
Honorable Members of this august House,
I am not very fit to count all the different situations that have affected refugees based on xenophobia. However, I can ask on this account that xenophobia be considered as crime just as is racial discrimination. In addition, there should be no mercy for those who take away our lives. Measures such as taking away theirs should also be implemented. This will not only protect refugees but also the South African population that also need peace and security. I also ask this House to pass policies that encourage South Africans to travel around Africa, and institutions should consider comparing South Africa to other African countries before they can do so with India, Brazil and other Western countries. This will help the South African citizen to apprehend the social issues around Africa and their responsibilities for the continent as a whole.
Honorable Members, I dare think that the elaboration of policies that protect us on the basis of xenophobia and frustration can help fulfill the prophecy of the President in his State of the Nation address when he said: "Those who had had despair imposed upon them, rejoiced in the triumph of the angel of hope, that brought a new life of a shared neighbourhood to all our people, no longer fractured by high, fortified wall of hatred, fear and mistrust."
  1. Identification of refugees
Madame Speaker,
Honorable Members,
On arrival, the documents given to asylum seekers are not different from those I saw in the archives of the Democratic Republic of Congo, which the colonial administration used to hand to the "evolved (les évolués)". Only, when in possession of this document could the newly certified individual go to town. Anyway, the documents that we are given also play the same role as the certificate of the evolved I have mentioned above.
Now it is the turn of the maroon identity card, the most discriminated document by most employers, officials and institutions in the country. Some employers have referred to it as the diplomatic passport. It takes ages to be issued and expires days after one has received it. Its renewal takes longer than its first issue and the applicant has to go through the same procedure. This procedure creates an unfortunate delay in delivery because the details of the concerned refugee remain the same. The renewed documents, in most cases will come with mistakes, giving the refugee an identity that does not belong to them. Approached Home Affairs on this issue, the explanation is "Government does not have resources."
I believe this situation can be addressed by allocating us an identity card with possibility of extension just as it is done with travel documents. This kind of identity document will save on resources and time to print and help avoid careless mistakes.
Due to high bureaucracy in the Home Affairs offices that deal with refugees, unending queues of people are unavoidable. Refugees are at offices as early as 04:00 am and some are even compelled to sleep over there with little chance to be served at an office that only opens at 8 o’clock. The reality is that, for instance, the refugee office in Cape Town serves 15 people a day!
During his state to the Nation address that I have referred to earlier, President Thabo Mbeki said: "We must be impatient with those in the public service who see themselves as pen-pushers and guardians of rubber stamps, thieves intent on self-enrichment, bureaucrats who think they have the right to ignore the vision of Batho Pele, who come to work as late as possible, work as little as possible and knock off as early as possible."
  1. Employment
Madame Speaker,
Honorable Members of this House,
Research proves that the majority of refugees in the country have completed secondary education; some have completed a university degree. Brief, all have had an education of some sort. Yet, it is the same people, with much to offer to this country that you find scrolling at parking bays, begging for cents and remainders from the shopper’s baskets. The country has not yet recognized the potential and the ability of the African refugee.
We ask the government, through this House, to consider cutting the penalty fee that is imposed to an employer who hires foreign personnel. This will allow us to compete on the employment market at the same level as nationals. We also ask this House to pass a legislation that allows government and any organisation that serves refugees to include refugees among their staff.
Refugees have never had a privilege to work in this country and where they have, they are often victims of discrimination. They have never benefited from the Employment Equity Act or any labor related legislation. One example of discrimination in the workplace is in the Security industry, the biggest employer of refugees in the country. The Security Industry Regulations Authority (SIRA) does not grant registration certificate to refugees, although they have trained and fit for the job. As a result, refugees have gone far as to get illegal documents with fake names claiming SIRA issued certificates. This malpractice has produced fat cats in the SIRA business as one SIRA registered certificate pays more than once the fee that is required by the certificate because the certificate is shared by a multitude of individuals, at the mercy of government.


  1. Shelter
South Africa does not provide shelter for refugees and asylum seekers. It is a major concern that, once in the country, one finds nowhere to go with no one they know. It also turns out that the organisations that plead to shelter refugees are either considerate for women and children. This condition is likely to damage the family relationship in a situation concerning married people and looks discriminating to males. The lack of shelter for asylum seekers and refugees adds numbers on the homeless in the country.
Madame Speaker, those who like to compare South Africa with Western countries can help us answer this question: Why haven’t they compared their country with the West when it comes to conditions of refugees?
  1. Education
Madame Speaker,
Honorable Members,
Although research has proven that most refugees have had an education of some sort, many are still willing to further their education within universities or acquire professional skills they will need upon their return home.
There is no educational sponsorship available to refugees and asylum seekers that may allow them to gain the skills. This situation continues to frustrate the refugee or the asylum seeker who is willing to return because soon after their return home, they are likely to find themselves disempowered and useless.
I am asking government to look at meaningful ways to extend the educational opportunities to refugees and asylum seekers as it does for nationals.
  1. Corruption in Government institutions
Few months ago, the Refugee Reception Office in Cape Town, under the Department of Home Affairs made big news when the Cape Times disclosed evidence of corruption involving officials and refugees. Three days after, we had the Minister of Home Affairs as guest to address the issues when she was shown a letter from a Home Affairs official proving bribery, by a Somali refugee. No instance was done and surprisingly, the same officers were consolidated in their positions. This attitude contradicts the President’s commitment that "corruption at any level of the administration will not be tolerated." The same practice of corruption has led the government to have inaccurate statistics on the number of refugees that are in the country as some refugees are registered with different reception offices.
Last week, I heard of a lady who was denied a refugee status because she could not give to the request of a Home Affairs officer at Cape Town Reception office, who asked for sex so that the unfortunate woman could qualify for a status.
  1. Organisations of refugee support
Some organisations of refugee support are merely businesses for profit organised around the word with the "refugee" as the product for display. In order to access funding, these organisations are registered as "non-profit organisations, social welfare organisations only to evade from tax. They are merely "for-profits" and are selling their services to not only refugees but also to anyone who needs them. Others are unknown to refugees and do not know refugees on their turn, or simply service the only connected refugee. The word "refugee" has been for them an advantage to drain money and other resources from Government and other funding institutions. Some of these organisations, sheltered with prominent individuals, hungry for wealth, only wait for 20 June, a day we (refugees) do not need, to pass their rhetorics on issues to accomplish about refugees. I am openly asking this House that an investigation be done to reveal the spending of these organisations. I am also confident to say that, these organisations, if probed to disclose the use of the funding they receive, several irregularities, or else, hidden agendas can be found. Those found in financial irregularities should be brought before justice.
I do not know how true is this affirmation from a journalist, who once told me that whenever South Africa is under International pressure concerning refugees, politicians are ready to deliver sweet statements to promise better conditions for refugees. True or false as it may be, receiving an unwanted guest is an insult. Therefore, South Africa, if you do not want refugees on your soil, tell the world and stand clear. South Africa, with her widely praised constitution and the fact that there is no refugee camp has given the world wrong pictures that the conditions are well off for refugees and asylum seekers, whereas they are not.
  1. Peace and security in our home countries
Madame Speaker,
Honorable Members of this august House,
Those of us, refugees that are coming from counties torn by war will fully acknowledge and thank the Republic of South Africa for the efforts this country has displayed in order to bring peace and security back in these war-torn countries. However, we cannot be shy to insinuate the fact that South Africa has taken these wars as an occasion to market and sell its weaponry in these parts of the world. As an example, Madame Speaker, in 2003 it was proven that one quarter of the weapons used in the war by all the conflicting parties in the Democratic Republic of Congo were made in South Africa. Considering war as the main catalyst for the people’s mass exodus towards a nightmare, thus changing lives into refugees, it is extremely unacceptable to negotiate peace on the right hand and supply weapons to frighten the peace on the left hand. I therefore ask this august House, Madam Speaker, to seek a Bill that prohibits the Republic of South Africa to supply weapons to warring parties in any country, and to negotiate any weapon-related business in South Africa between governments and warring parties in time of war in their counties. .
Madame Speaker,
Honorable Members,
We have not only encountered hardships and dilemmas in this country. We have also met generous South Africans, both institutions and individuals who responded to our calls when we cried. They sacrificed their time, income and resources of any kind to serve the refugees they could reach. Of these, I can list the institutions of justice such as the courts, which remained unfair in the administration of justice. Others, like the Legal Resource Centre, the Legal Aid Clinic of the University of Cape Town, the Trauma Centre and many individuals I cannot name here, including those who hand their change to us at parking bays are highly to commend.
After looking at all the frustrations that the African refugee faces on motherland, I can say along Chinua Achebe "Things fall apart." Yes, they have fallen apart for refugees and asylum seekers!
I am sure that fellow companions in the struggle will add on what I failed to say or express more clearly, what I could not.
Proud of the achievement over the decade of democracy, President Thabo Mbeki had this to say:
"As we enter the second decade of liberation, we must continue to build the sense of national unity, united action, and the new patriotism that have manifested themselves in our people’s response to the calls – faranani, masikhane, letsema and vuk’uzenzele! Working together, in conditions of entrenched democracy, respect of human rights, peace and stability, we must continue to produce the Good News that has made our country a place of hope even for other people in the rest o the world.
Whether this citation from the President is true or false to us, whether it is applicable to refugees remains a question to answer in this House. The reality however remains. We are suffering and something positive to better this trend be done.
I thank you.


Monday 27 September 2010

Help us fight against stereotypes

Three years ago, I was researching for my project for a Private Public radiostation. . I had to go through a lot of internet based publications and contacts when suddenly I came across this one. It is a pure reprensentation of racism in its crude form. What does it serve to feed on racism? whom does it benefit, if at all? The United States has its first black President. Some other called "developped nations have black parliamentarians and some have black ministers. You now find black people in every think tank circle of research. But why are black people still seen as inferior? can this trend be reversed? The answer lies in hopes, with your support. Please help us by commenting and sharing this reading:

This article was read on a New York radio station having been written by a Caucasian (white man). I know it might not apply to you but it makes you think a little bit and is very hard to swallow.
THEY ARE STILL OUR SLAVES
We can continue to reap profits from the Blacks without the effort of physical slavery. Look at the current methods of containment that they use on themselves: IGNORANCE, GREED, and SELFISHNESS.
Their IGNORANCE is the primary weapon of containment. A great man said, "The best way to hide something from Black people is to put it in a book." We now live in the Information Age. They have gained the opportunity to read any book on any subject through the efforts of their fight for freedom, yet they refuse to read. There are numerous books readily available at Borders, Barnes &Noble, and Amazon.com, not to mention their own Black Bookstores that provide solid blueprints to reach economic equality (which should have been their fight all along), but few read consistently, if at all.
GREED is another powerful weapon of containment. Blacks, since the abolition of slavery, have had large amounts of money at their disposal. Last year they spent 10 billion dollars during Christmas, out of their 450 billion dollars in total yearly income (2.22%). Any of us can use them as our target market, for any business venture we care to dream up, no matter how outlandish, they will buy into it. Being primarily a consumer people, they function totally by greed. They continually want more, with little thought for saving or investing. They would rather buy some new sneaker than invest in starting a business. Some even neglect their children to have the latest Tommy or FUBU, and they still think that having a Mercedes and a big house gives them "Status" or that they have achieved their Dream. They are fools! The vast majority of their people are still in poverty because their greed holds them back from collectively making better communities. With the help of BET, and the rest of their black media that often broadcasts destructive images into their own homes, we will continue to see huge profits like those of Tommy and Nike. (Tommy Hilfiger has even jeered them, saying he doesn't want their money, and look at how the fools spend more with him than ever before!). They'll continue to show off to each other while we build solid communities with the profits from our businesses that we market to them.
SELFISHNESS, ingrained in their minds through slavery, is one of the major ways we can continue to contain them. One of their own, Dubois said that there was an innate division in their culture. A "Talented Tenth" he called it. He was correct in his deduction that there are segments of their culture that has achieved some "form" of success. However, that segment missed the fullness of his work. They didn't read that the "Talented Tenth" was then responsible to aid The Non-Talented Ninety-percent in achieving a better life. Instead, that segment has created another class, a Buppie class that looks down on their people or aids them in a condescending manner. They will never achieve what we have. Their selfishness does not allow them to be able to work together on any project or endeavor of substance. When they do get together, their selfishness lets their egos get in the way of their goal. Their so-called help organizations seem to only want to promote their name without making! any real change in their community. They are content to sit in conferences and conventions in our hotels, and talk about what they will do, while they award plaques to the best speakers, not the best doers. Is there no end to their selfishness? They steadfastly refuse to see that TOGETHER EACH ACHIEVES MORE (TEAM) They do not understand that they are no better than each other of what they own as a matter of fact, most of those Buddies are but one or two pay checks away from poverty. All of which is under the control of our pens in our offices and our rooms. Yes, we will continue to contain them as long as they refuse to read, continue to buy anything they want, and keep thinking they are "helping" their communities by paying dues to organizations which do little other than hold lavish conventions in our hotels. By the way, don't worry about any of them reading this letter, remember, 'THEY DON'T READ!!!!

(PROVE THEM WRONG. PLEASE PASS THIS ON! AFTER READING IT..)
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Can Humans Learn Lifestyles approaches from Animals? My answer: aresounding Yes!

AT SCHOOL WITH  THE CHAMELEON

This is an introduction to my book: "Kissing hands of The Devil"

Yes brothers, let us revolt; but against sin and all the bad habits. We are certain that evil will not go through even the best of its nets to reach to us or to bring to failure our plans of love. We cannot  achieve anything by our own; fighting against flesh and blood won’t help any cause. Our hope rests in God’s care, He who punishes those he loves. When the land is in trouble, leaders are many…

I have always acknowledged with no surprise, shamelessly, that I am a tourist on short notice in this world and in so saying, I needed guidance, I needed a mentor. Lesson one on the tour was that I need to be more an observer than a speaker. It is a lesson from mother Nature, who in her own, is very silent but whatever she embodies is the best guidance every humankind, aspiring to peace can ever learn from. This silence is so beautiful and a lesson or two is that birds of feather always flock better together.  Joining the Chameleon in its experience is no cowardice but a commitment to adjustment which, as human, shape what we become. The chameleon has taught me that it is very possible to lose the destination but never the destiny…

Animals have the best techniques and skills to live harmoniously together. They are even peacemakers between themselves, especially those of the same species. Humans, in their nature, are changing species, which allows them to adapt and conform to new settings. In defining of my own niche, I chose to learn from the chameleon.

Whom else has ever watched this marvellous animal? it teaches morale better than an ordinary professor of Ethics, better than a teacher of religion. Whenever the chameleon decides to follow a certain direction, it does not turn the head back. To the learner I was, it taught me to be objective and never to allow distraction from any source no matter the difficulties it will take to reach the result.

Instead of turning the head, when the chameleon decides to engage in a certain direction, it rather turns the eyes. Like an intelligent investigator, or an adequate informer, this technique served me to figure out the importance of information and documentation. I now knew that I share this space with many other species; that I am not alone in this world.

The world is like a big university, called universe. As does the chameleon, I have to conform. When my lecturer reaches a foreign place, he adapts by taking the color of the place. Not being a hypocrite, this in itself is rather bravery, tolerance and good manners. Without this attitude, one can never adapt to new settings which pose new threats and challenges. What does it benefit people to fight each other instead of embracing one another? The answer is obvious. It helps nothing to shake one another, we’d better be well-off by shaping one another, instead. No project has ever been and will be completed in fighting. Even fight itself! If we choose to understand one another, than we will coexist. I live for the next and so does the other for me…

What about the chameleon’s walk? The teacher is not arrogant. He uses balance. He lifts one foot, then the other. This is being very prudent. As humans, this technique is very important. It will save us resources as well as time. When the chameleon is walking on an elevated space, he hangs by tying the tail in order to maintain himself and avoid a fall even if the feet would lose the point. How much as humans can we save, how much trouble can we avoid if we were technical and prudent like this professor? The assurance of success is not always common rule to humans as it is for the chameleon in his march.

In this jungle commonly called universe, force is always the weapon the most used by humans in order to subjugate the weak in society.  So does the chameleon. But the difference is that the chameleon only subdues for prey. Unlike humans who’d do whatever it costs to make the next person suffer, the chameleon only worries about its stomach. In the hunt for food, my professor does not rush on the prey but unleashes the tongue. In so doing, this confidence is the weapon to survive. If it rewards, the teacher rejoices. If doesn’t, he will try next… My lesson is that our tongue is for achieving visions and efforts through dialogue and not force and coercion. In this way, we can avoid harm as does my professor. Slowly, peacefully and objectively plans and projects are achieved. Even those projects we are thought not able to achieve!

With my dumb professor, I learnt this major lesson: in whatever to do, let us be patient, good and humble as objective, too. This is being human first before any other attempt. And this is the way to go and so, I adapt… to different and allien settings. Welcome aboard my boat and let us all go to task!


These handpainted pictures are looking for buyers

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, they say. But no matter who looks at these picture, beauty is real... You do not have to go back in history, or think about Galileo. Do not think about Da Vinci and others you read about in history books. These are real and they capture your eyes. They bring you to question your self and your understanding of beauty. There are many more available and you can suggest a theme of what you want. We can post anywhere in the world and payment methods are agreed upon before any dealings... various sizes available as well.





















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